An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
why did the orphan not have a girlfriend? because he thought that she would leave him to.
So I caught my girlfriend masturbating with a carrot. My first reaction was “Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now it’s gonna taste like carrots!”
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!” She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?” To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
little johnny was siting in class one day and the teacher was talking about life and ask him " little johnny how do you want your wife to be like" and he answered " like the moon" and the teacher said " that’s such a beautiful answer because it calm and peaceful " and little htm title=' appears at night and disappears in the morning'>johnny said " no because it appears at night and disappears in the morning"
What is similar about a dog and a woman? You can ask them to come
what do you get when you play a country song backwards? you get your wife, your house, and your kids back
I decided to visit Saudi Arabia with my girlfriend. She and I learned they celebrate Pride month by throwing stones.
The other day my friend messaged by saying “bro I have two pieces of bad news for you.” I told him to combine them. He replied with “your girlfriend is cheating on both of us.”
Your at your girlfriends house for a family dinner. Your GF says, " Daddy please pass me the salt." when you and her father begin to reach for the salt.
A wife is like a grenade. Pull the ring and the house is gone.
My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is steadily improving.
Two men were talking about their wives The first man says “My wife is an angel.” The second man says “You’re lucky, mine’s still alive.”
Women are like dogs… “Where are you going? Where are you going? Where are you going?” “Can I come? Can I come? Can I come? ” “I’ll wait right here… I’ll wait right here… I’ll wait right here…” SHOES
I’ve been looking for my ex girlfriend’s killer for the past two years. But no one would do it.
RUS | ENG
