Only one of Kenny’s girlfriends has ever said he’s good in bed. But she has to. She’s his mom.
How do you know when you girlfriend is to young ? you have to make airoplane noises to get her to open her mouth… sorry
what do you get when you play a country song backwards? you get your wife, your house, and your kids back
Vagina jokes aren’t funny. Moist of the time.
What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb You can unscrew a light bulg
Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line he comes across a woman who Isn?’t saluting. ?Why are you not saluting like the others? ? Hitler barks. ?"Mein Fuhrer, I?m the nurse," she responds "I?m not crazy!?
A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a coma. After 6 months she woke. She asked the doctor “hows the baby?” “You had twins” the doctor replied. “Your brother named them” the woman said *oh no not my brother what did he call them?" “He called the girl Denise” “what about the boy” the woman asked the doctor said “denephew”
The doctor says “your wife is PREGNENT” the man says that he used a condom and the doctor says "ya but I didn’t
When your girlfriend has an abortion, it’s kinda like dodging your own bullets.
Men vacuum in the same way that they have sex. They just put it in and make some noise for 3 minutes before they collapse on the couch and think that their wife should be really happy.
Wife: (on phone) hi Husband: hey I didn’t know dishwashers talk and make me a sandwich.
my girl is so cute when she sleeps I watch her all the time……………….tomorrow I might say hi to her for the first time
A : Whats the similarity between your girlfriend and the Sun? B : They’re both hot? A : They’re both massive.
Tell a woman she’s beautiful a hundred times and she won’t believe you. Tell a woman she’s fat once and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.
One night a girl said to her family "Goodnight Mommy, Goodnight Daddy, Goodnight Grandma, Goodbye Grandpa. the next morning her grandpa died. That night she said "Goodnight mommy, Goodnight daddy, Goodbye Grandma. the next morning the grandma died. The dad started to fear for his life because he was next. That night the girl said "Goodnight mommy, Goodbye daddy. the next morning the dad woke up and he was perfectly fine but when he went into the kitchen he saw his wife crying. when he asked her whats wrong she said “The Mail Man died”.
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