Woman jokes

i like my woman like i like my coffee in a big sack on top of donkey

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Vagina jokes aren’t funny. Moist of the time.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

I said to my pregnant wife push darling , come on push harder dear , no she wasn’t giving birth the bloody car would not start .

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What does the cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend? He wipes his butt.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Fishing and girlfriends are exactly alike, there may be plenty of fish in the sea, but until i find one, i’m stuck here holding my rod

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Roast: What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One is hairy and smells like fish and the other is a walrus. Your welcome

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A young blonde woman fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. The hysterical blonde tells her husband: “Shut up … you’re next!”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Wife:Honey im pregnant Husband:Hi Pregnant im dad Wife:No you’re not

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

How do you know when you girlfriend is to young ? you have to make airoplane noises to get her to open her mouth… sorry

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room. My father is like Houdini, when he heard his girlfriend was pregnant he disappeared.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A programmer and his wife. She says, “We’re out of bread. Please go the grocery store and buy one. And if they’ve got eggs, get six.” After a while, he’s back with six loaves of bread. The wife asks, “Why did you buy 6 loaves of bread?” He replies, “They had eggs.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

My wife told me pass her lip stck but i gave her a glue stick now she is not talking to me

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

One day a guy named Carson is called a jerk and he says "I went to a party with my girlfriend and this random guy walks up to us and says can I borrow your girlfriend for a 30 minutes I say yes and he takes her up stairs. It was not only 30 minutes but a hour. When she came back down she was out of breath so I knew it was a pretty intense conversation.this happens about 3 more times that night. But as I was saying only a nice guy would let his girlfriend make friends with other guys ????

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

At the resturant, the waitress starts flirting with me. “She must have COVID,” my wife said. “Why?” I asked. “Cuz she clearly has no taste.” She responded.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Wife: “I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?” Husband: “You have perfect eyesight.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026