Woman jokes

you can tell a lot about a woman’s mood just by her hands. For example, if she’s holding a gun, she’s probably angry.

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Man: "Is your body from Mcdonalds?" Woman: "Why, because your loving it?" Man: “No, because its fat and greasy.” :D

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Wife: “I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?” Husband: “You have perfect eyesight.”

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One night a girl said to her family "Goodnight Mommy, Goodnight Daddy, Goodnight Grandma, Goodbye Grandpa. the next morning her grandpa died. That night she said "Goodnight mommy, Goodnight daddy, Goodbye Grandma. the next morning the grandma died. The dad started to fear for his life because he was next. That night the girl said "Goodnight mommy, Goodbye daddy. the next morning the dad woke up and he was perfectly fine but when he went into the kitchen he saw his wife crying. when he asked her whats wrong she said “The Mail Man died”.

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Jon said:What do you call a pregnant woman? Mike said: I don’t know what? Jon said: kinder surprise

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An American woman married a British man. On their honeymoon, the British husband said, ?You look like a million pounds!? The wife divorced him.

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If a man drove over a woman, whose fault was it? The man, because he shouldn’t be driving in the kitchen.

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