Woman jokes

I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.

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A woman comes to the doctor and tells her ‘doctor, my husband wants intense sex all day, what should I give him?’ The doctor says ‘my number’

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A man robs a bank and asks a woman, “did you see that?” She says “yes”, so the man shoots her. He leaves the bank and sees a couple, he asks “did you see that?” “No but my wife did!” The husband said.

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The cops are still searching for my wife’s killer. Luckily I already fled the country.

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"I’d rather go through the pain of childbirth again than let you drill in my mouth,"the woman told her dentist. He replied, “Well, please make up your mind so I can adjust my chair.”

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An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

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Flippity floppity women are property

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A blind man walks into a bar, and asks the bartender, “Wanna hear a blonde joke?” The bartender replies with, “I’m blonde, the man working next to me is blonde, the woman next to you is blonde, and the fat guy behind you is blonde.” Then says “Do you really wanna tell the blonde joke? ” the blind guy responds with "No I don’t wanna tell it that many times.

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Why has Stephen hawking’s stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector

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Why did the Chinese woman hang up? Because she Wang the Wong number

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The Coach of the Detroit Lions had put together the perfect football team. But then his quarterback got blindsided and was out for the season with a knee injury. Then his backup went down with a concussion. He tried the trading route, free agents, but nobody any good was available. One evening while watching the news from Iraq, he saw a young Iraqi soldier

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My girlfriend called me a bot in fortnite, so I called her sandwich maker 3000

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My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, “No, wait! I can change.”

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Why do women rub their eyes in the morning? Because they don’t have balls.

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I showed my girlfriend my shotgun yesterday. It really blew her away.

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