What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg? Eileen
School Bully: How’s your girlfriend? Oh wait, you don’t have any! Me: How’s your parents? Oh wait, you don’t have any! *Continues to burn down orphanage
Why couldn’t the lizard get a girlfriend? Because he had a reptile dysfunction!
like if you have a boyfriend girlfriend or husband or wife or a crush.
A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a coma. After 6 months she woke. She asked the doctor “hows the baby?” “You had twins” the doctor replied. “Your brother named them” the woman said *oh no not my brother what did he call them?" “He called the girl Denise” “what about the boy” the woman asked the doctor said “denephew”
Roast: What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One is hairy and smells like fish and the other is a walrus. Your welcome
I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
how do you know when your wife is cheating on you? she comes home with sparkles on her face
20 years of sex in the dark the wife find out he was using a dildo the wife get angry and says ?explain the dildo prick? the husband says ?explain the children bitch
A woman gets rid of polish with chemicals and no one bats an eye The Germans got rid of polish with chemicals and everyone lost their mind
I know a woman who owns a taser. – She’s stunning!
Do you know what’s the difference between a knife and a girl’s argument A knife has a point
My girlfriend is 19 and I’m 29. We go out to eat in a restaurant but the whole time I have to deal with being accused of being a pedo, being called disgusting and disturbed. It completely ruined our 10 year anniversary
Why do women rub their eyes in the morning? Because they don’t have balls.
What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb You can’t unscrew a pregnant woman What’s a similarity between a broken lightbulb, and a pregnant woman They’re both accidents
RUS | ENG
