If a man drove over a woman, whose fault was it? The man, because he shouldn’t be driving in the kitchen.
Two girls have a sleepover. Karen: Let’s go to bed. Lauren:Fine, but it’s early. *Karen wakes up and exits room" Lauren hears noise Mikey: Your so much better than my girlfriend Karen. Lauren: laughs Lauren: remembers her boyfriend is Karen’s brother Mikey
There was a cannibal who had a wife and (eight) kids.
Girlfriend: you remind me of a cellphone Ex Boyfriend: how and why? Girlfriend: Because your about to die
The doctor says “your wife is PREGNENT” the man says that he used a condom and the doctor says "ya but I didn’t
i cought my girlfriend cheating on me, with our dad.
What do you call it if your mom is a guy and ur dad is a woman? Transparent
Therapist: so what brought you here today? wife: he’s too literal Therapist: and you sir? husband: my truck
What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb You can unscrew a light bulg
Tell a woman she’s beautiful a hundred times and she won’t believe you. Tell a woman she’s fat once and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.
Flippity floppity women are property
A young blonde woman fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. The hysterical blonde tells her husband: “Shut up … you’re next!”
Wives are like grenades… – Remove the ring and boom, house is gone!
Billy: spits out food Mom: BILLY! We swallow what we have in our mouths. Dad: looks at mom Mom: Shut up If you get you get it
how did Stephan hawking please his woman he uses a hard drive.
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