A wife and husband was setting up their computer and the husband makes the password my dick, but the wife fell on the floor laughing because the computer said the password was too short.
What do you call it if your mom is a guy and ur dad is a woman? Transparent
rmm
A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a coma. After 6 months she woke. She asked the doctor “hows the baby?” “You had twins” the doctor replied. “Your brother named them” the woman said *oh no not my brother what did he call them?" “He called the girl Denise” “what about the boy” the woman asked the doctor said “denephew”
20 years of sex in the dark the wife find out he was using a dildo the wife get angry and says ?explain the dildo prick? the husband says ?explain the children bitch
I was talking to this absolutely gorgeous woman, and I asked her, “what do you do?” And she said, “I’m a brain surgeon.” And I don’t know if this makes me sexist or not, but I was really impressed. Most women can’t pull off sarcasm
Hey what is the difference between a painting and a wife? Only the wife was hung up
Why do women rub their eyes in the morning? Because they don’t have balls.
i cought my girlfriend cheating on me, with our dad.
Me and my girlfriend were planning on having sex but I said me and my little brother share a bunk bed and he’s on the bottom. She said tell him we’re making sandwiches so we came up with a plan. Tomato means harder and cheese means faster. So we were having sex and she was screaming tomato tomato tomato cheese cheese cheese, then my little brother said can y’all stop making sandwiches your getting mayonnaise all over my bed.
A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone. It’s either really terrible news or really great news.
Wife: (on phone) hi Husband: hey I didn’t know dishwashers talk and make me a sandwich.
Why has Stephen hawking’s stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector
What’s the difference between a battery and my wife? The battery has a positive side
A woman noticed her husband standing on a bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. “Ha! Thats not going to help! ” She said. “Sure it does.” he said. “Its the only way i can see the numbers.”
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