Woman jokes

its only ok to beat up an dwarf when they walk up to your wife and say your hair smells nice I saw my wife at the dam yesterday. Drat. I was hoping she might float a bit more downstream.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A Man walks into a bar and Orders 3 shots of Whisky, The Bartender asks "What’s got you down" The man says “I just found out my Niece is gay.” The next day he orders 4 shots of Whisky The Bartender asks “What’s got you down now?” The man says "I just found out my son is gay." The next day he orders 6 shots of whisky The Bartender says "Got anybody who likes Women? " The man says “My wife does.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

FIRST DATE man: i work with animals every day woman: oh how sweet! what is it that you do? man: im a butcher…

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers. To be honest, I should have seen the signs.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

how did Stephan hawking please his woman he uses a hard drive.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I see some objects over there… oh never mind, that’s a woman.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

My girlfriend and I often laugh about how competitive we are… But I laugh more. How can you tell if you have a high sperm count? When your girlfriend has to chew before she swallows.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why do orphans make the best girlfriends? Because They don’t need permission from their Parents

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is steadily improving.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side so i crashed the car.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I comforted my friend about his wife’s death: until I found out who did it.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Two friends who’ve been bros for forever see each other in Wal-Mart in the card section. The first guy asks what he got his wife for her birthday. The second guy tells him he got her a Maserati and a card. The first guy tells him he got his wife a card and a dildo for her birthday. The second guy asks why he got his wife a dildo for her birthday. The first guy says, “If she doesn’t like the card I got her, then she can go f@ck herself!”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. – If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

The Coach of the Detroit Lions had put together the perfect football team. But then his quarterback got blindsided and was out for the season with a knee injury. Then his backup went down with a concussion. He tried the trading route, free agents, but nobody any good was available. One evening while watching the news from Iraq, he saw a young Iraqi soldier

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

An artist is commissioned to create a painting celebrating Soviet-Polish friendship, to be called “Lenin in Poland.” When the painting is unveiled at the Kremlin, there is a gasp from the invited guests. The painting depicts Lenin’s wife naked in bed with Leon Trotsky. “But this is a travesty! Where is Lenin? ” Asks one of the guests. “Lenin is in Poland,” replies the painter.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026