Husband: Hay honey words can’t describe how beautiful you are. Wife: aww thanks Husband:But numbers can 0 out of 10
Two girls have a sleepover. Karen: Let’s go to bed. Lauren:Fine, but it’s early. *Karen wakes up and exits room" Lauren hears noise Mikey: Your so much better than my girlfriend Karen. Lauren: laughs Lauren: remembers her boyfriend is Karen’s brother Mikey
My girlfriend got ran over by a bus I lost my job as a bus driver.
My ex-wife still misses me… BUT HER AIM IS GETTIN BETTER!
what is the diffrence between a snow woman and a snowman? Snowballs
Two men were talking about their wives The first man says “My wife is an angel.” The second man says “You’re lucky, mine’s still alive.”
A : Whats the similarity between your girlfriend and the Sun? B : They’re both hot? A : They’re both massive.
Vagina jokes aren’t funny. Moist of the time.
Man: "Is your body from Mcdonalds?" Woman: "Why, because your loving it?" Man: “No, because its fat and greasy.” :D
A husband and a wife have four children the oldest three are tall with blonde hair, the youngest is short with brown hair. The husband was on his deathbed and said “honey, can you be completely honest with me, is our youngest son mine?” The wife says “I swear to all that is holy he is your son.” Then the husband died and the wife muttered, “thank god he didn’t ask about the other three.”
I have a girlfriend.
My girlfriends last words I can’t wait to become a mom
What’s the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.
I was watching my daughter play at the park, a woman came up to me and asked which one was mine, I said I was still choosing.
you can tell a lot about a woman’s mood just by her hands. For example, if she’s holding a gun, she’s probably angry.
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