If a woman sleeps with 10 men she’s a slut, but if a man does it… He’s gay, definitely gay.
You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. – If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.
One day I got home and told my girlfriend “I cheated on you.” she replied with “F**k you” I then said “But you won’t, that’s why I cheated on you.”
A man comes home and finds his wife in bed with another guy “What’s going on here!?” He exclaims. The wife replies “See, I told you he was stupid.”
Most states: “It’s ok, it won’t be awkward. We’re still friends.” Alabama: “She didn’t wanna be my girlfriend anymore. But she said she’ll still be my sister.”
A drunk man walked out of a bar and kept falling flat on his face. He wondered why this was until his wife spoke to him: Wife: why is your face all bloody? Husband: I was so drunk that I couldn’t stand up so I kept falling on my face! Wife: idiot. You left your wheelchair at the bar!
what is the diffrence between a snow woman and a snowman? Snowballs
Last halloween i went dressed as a woman. When i rang the doorbell an elderly woman opened and i made grunting noise and knocked the bowl of candy out of her hands. She immediately called the police and told them excactly what happened. The officer pulled me aside and asked me a few questions. First he asked are your parents here and i said nothing. Concerned by my answer he then asked if i was ok so i said nothing. He asked me what my name and i responded, "Hellen Keller.
What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg? Eileen
My wife thinks i’m immature, so I told her to get out of my fort.
i cought my girlfriend cheating on me, with our dad.
3 citizens were going through an exam to become agents of the FBI, their instructor handed the first guy a gun in a room with his wife and said he had to shoot them, he walked out in shame and said he couldn’t do it. The second guy had the same scenario, he put the gun up but couldn’t pull the trigger so he walked out in shame. The third guy was put in the same scenario, he walked out and told the instructor, “The gun wasn’t loaded, I had to strangle the bitch.”
A wife and husband was setting up their computer and the husband makes the password my dick, but the wife fell on the floor laughing because the computer said the password was too short.
My wife told me I was immature. I just told her to get out of my pillow fort.
20 years of sex in the dark the wife find out he was using a dildo the wife get angry and says ?explain the dildo prick? the husband says ?explain the children bitch
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