Wife:Honey im pregnant Husband:Hi Pregnant im dad Wife:No you’re not
my boyfriend accused me of cheating. i told him he reminded me of my girlfriend.
My wife asked me to help cure her from sucking her thumb. So I drew a cock on it.
A feminist walks into a bar. Her friend says “oh my god your shoulders are broad!” another woman says “are you sure it’s a woman?”
Wife: “I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?” Husband: “You have perfect eyesight.”
one day a priest loses his cock (chicken) he goes to the church and says “who has seen a cock” all the woman raised their hands “no who has seen a cock that is not theirs” half the woman’s htm title=' my cock” all the nuns hands went up'>hands went up “NO NO NO who has seen my cock” all the nuns hands went up
There was a cannibal who had a wife and (eight) kids.
Hey what is the difference between a painting and a wife? Only the wife was hung up
“What does the word ‘gay’ mean?” asked a son his father. “It means ‘happy’,” replied the father. “Oh,” contested the son, “so you are gay then?” “No, son, I have a wife.”
I was talking to this absolutely gorgeous woman, and I asked her, “what do you do?” And she said, “I’m a brain surgeon.” And I don’t know if this makes me sexist or not, but I was really impressed. Most women can’t pull off sarcasm
My girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile. That’s a big word for a seven year old.
The cops are still searching for my wife’s killer. Luckily I already fled the country.
i thought my wife was joking when she said she was gunna leave me because i wouldn’t stop singing “im a believer” but then i saw her face
What kind of woman does Bill Cosby like the most? The “cold and passed out” kind.
Little Johnny walked on into to his house.He heard a banging sound from up above and decied to investigate.He opened the door to his parents room and saw his naked mom and the woman next door. He thought they were wrestling and decided to join in.
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