Why can’t Helen Keller drive? Because she’s a woman.
When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room. My father is like Houdini, when he heard his girlfriend was pregnant he disappeared.
My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side so i crashed the car.
Me and my wife were out at dinner me being 48 and her being 19, people where screaming at us and calling me a creep. It realy ruined our 10th anniversary
What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg? Eileen
Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line he comes across a woman who Isn?’t saluting. ?Why are you not saluting like the others? ? Hitler barks. ?"Mein Fuhrer, I?m the nurse," she responds "I?m not crazy!?
A lot of things have changed since I got my girlfriend pregnant. My name, my address and my phone number.
Wife: “I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?” Husband: “You have perfect eyesight.”
how do you know when your wife is cheating on you? she comes home with sparkles on her face
Wife: (on phone) hi Husband: hey I didn’t know dishwashers talk and make me a sandwich.
Doctor: Madam, Your Husband Needs Rest And Peace So Here Are Some Sleeping Pills. Wife: Doctor, When Should I Give Them To Him? Doctor: They Are For You.!!
Girlfriend: am I pretty or ugly? Boyfriend: your both! Girlfriend: what do you mean by that? Boyfriend: your pretty ugly!!!
A wife and husband had been on a strict diet and the wife said yaknow weve been good about our diet lets have a cheat night tonight. The wife came home with kfc and wendys. the husband came home with sylvia from the office.
like if you have a boyfriend girlfriend or husband or wife or a crush.
If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.
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